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Maggie Goes to “The Spring Fling”

Dear Doggie Lovers - It’s me – Maggie.

Me and Daddy Earl went to ‘The Spring Fling’ at our church recently. You see, I’m the ‘Church Dog.’ I’m expected to attend these functions. It was a big party to celebrate spring. My Daddy Earl had work to do. Me and him had to block off a big section of the church parking lot for people to dance and act silly. They do that crazy thing called ‘The Chicken Dance.’ Folks, I’ll tell you the truth. It really embarrassed me to see them flapping their arms and moving their bodies around trying to act like an old chicken. Can you believe that? Who would want to act like a chicken?

Anyway, I was the Bell of the Ball. I went to and fro, meeting and greeting everyone to my heart’s content. You know, I’m a social girl!

I’m still a bit puzzled about one peculiar thing that happened at the party. They did something called face painting. People were getting all worked up having their faces painted with all kinds of things – flowers, stars, balloons, butterflies, footballs – You name it – they had it painted on. One man even had an orange posey painted on his bald head and someone said he needed some horns too. So he let them paint him some black horns beside that posey. My goodness - That was an awful sight.

Then someone got the big idea Old Maggie should have her face painted. I said, “Whoa.” They wanted to paint a heart on my nose. Well, I’ll tell you right now, I was not going to let them do that! A girl’s got to have some dignity. Even Daddy Earl tried to get me to let them paint my face, but I just put my foot down and said, “No!”

Finally, they gave up on me, so I went on my merry way – tail thumping, greeting and generally socializing with all the party animals. I had huge bites of hamburgers and hot dogs and all sorts of goodies. Everyone would say, “Maggie’s a good girl. Come here Maggie, have a bite of this.” My friend even brought me water in a Dixie Cup. I was so busy with my welcoming personality, I got plumb thirsty. My friend is a ‘Good Girl.’ I’m one of her best friends. She calls me her ‘girlfriend.’

Then, something strange happened. Daddy Earl decided we needed to go home - in the middle of the party too. He said Maggie’s been at the party long enough. I always mind Daddy Earl, cause he knows best. I jumped in the car with him and away we went to our house. I was thinking all the time, we were just going to lay back and relax at home after the party. The odd thing was, my Daddy Earl opened the door and let me in the house, but he didn’t stay with me. He just locked me in the house and got in his car and left. Well, I’m telling you, I was beside myself – You could say, I had my ‘drawers in a wad.’ He didn’t say where he was going or anything. I didn’t know what to do. I was wearing my feet pads out pacing through the house. Suddenly, Maggie’s old light bulb came on. I thought, “I will just start barking and letting him know how mad I am.” That’ll bring him home. So I begin to bark and bark and bark, but he didn’t come home. I guess my barking bothered Mr. Tweed, our next door neighbor, cause he came over and told me to stop barking – He said my Daddy Earl was at church and he would be home in a little while. Well, Dag Gone it, why didn’t he tell me he was going back to church. It made me mad, because I wanted to go back to the party too. You see, I’m a party girl. I love parties. I don’t think Daddy Earl realized that he had hurt my feelings awful. Well, I sulked and sulked and sulked some more, but I did quit barking. I’d worn my barker out. Then, I said, “Maggie, why don’t you just calm down. When Daddy Earl comes home, you can give him a piece of your mind.” Having settled my problem, I thought “I need to come down off my ‘high horse. I’m getting all stressed out.” So, I got upon the bed and took a little snooze to destress myself.

But, you know, a funny thing happened. When Daddy Earl got back home, I forgot all about giving him a piece of my mind. I was so happy to see my buddy, I just licked his hand and wagged my tail and followed him around like a puppy. Old Maggie forgot all about her frustrations. They just disappeared with the wind.

As you know, my Daddy Earl and me are ‘Best Buds. I’ll bet you didn’t know we’re party animals’ too! I can’t wait for that next ‘spring fling.’

Sincerely,

Maggie

By J. Swann